October 31, 2011


Happy Halloween!

Pumpkin seeds are roasting in the oven, apple cider is in hand, and we're eagerly awaiting the trick-or-treaters.
{If my husband doesn't eat all of the candy first.}

Deep Breath...here comes November.

October 30, 2011

Honoring Eli and Michael

Hi Friends,

I am so touched by how many of you have reached out to me and shared how our sweet angels have blessed your lives in some way. I know they have and will continue to bless ours in ways we cannot yet imagine for ever and ever.

11.11.11 is coming up. Rather quickly. This is a day, mind you, that I imagined would be spent at home with my babies, whom surely would have arrived by then. On this day, I planned to hold them in my arms and celebrate their new lives. One day, I would tell them all about their special due date, even if they didn't arrive on that day. I can't hold them in my arms on that day. I can honor their lives.
Am I looking forward to this day? I am actually a complete mess about it. It is more than just a day to us. It is symbolic. Each year that passes, I will remember significant dates. Some are breathtakingly happy, like March 1st, the day we found out we were pregnant and March 14th, the day we found out we were having twins. Some are heart-wrenching and will probably stop me in my tracks for a lifetime. What will November 11th be? Will I become sullen on this day each year? Will I smile as I remember my angels? Time will only tell. But, our babies, however fleeting their time was with us here on earth, brought us a joy we had never experienced. No matter how broken our hearts may be, we want to celebrate our sons. We want to honor them. Hubby and I have thought about all of the possible ways to honor our sweet boys on this day and here is what we have come up with:

We will each release two blue balloons at 11:11 a.m. On each balloon, we will write messages to Elijah and Michael, and we'll send them up to Heaven, right along with our prayers and deepest love.

Hoda Kotb, breast cancer surviver, was given this advice: Don't hog your journey. Reading those words made me remember that while we are moving through our journey of life, love, grief, and happiness (in no particular order), so many of your are walking with us. You're also moving through the grief of losing our boys. You are climbing mountains of your own. You are holding my hand as I climb mine.  I am inviting you, our family and our friends (near or far, blogger world, real world, and both) to celebrate our babies on this day. Maybe I see you everyday, not nearly enough, or perhaps we've never even met yet our story and our boys have impacted your life in some way.

 If you feel moved to release two balloons in honor of Elijah and Michael, we would be so touched. If you would like to write messages on the balloons and are also able to release them at 11:11, that would be amazing. If you'd like to release balloons at any point in time on that day, that would be amazing. If you'd like to just send up a sweet prayer to them on that day, that would be amazing. If you do release balloons or do anything else to honor our boys on 11.11.11, I would love it if you'd take a picture and send it my way so that I can collect, keep and treasure them.

I like the idea of Michael and Eli watching down on us and seeing bunches of balloons coming up to them, reminding them how deeply missed, loved and cherished they are.

Thank you for helping us celebrate our precious babies.

October 25, 2011

The Blue Day Book

I needed to read this book today. I wish I could open it for you {believe me, I searched!}and could show you how precious the pictures are to go along with the beautiful words. I found it this summer knew I needed it. I became an instant fan so I had to check out The Blue Day book, one that I also needed to read today.

{Don't worry, I don't just sit around and read cheer-yourself-up books, though I do occasionally!} :)

Fortunately, I did find a sweet video that shares this book. Please watch it and hopefully it will make you smile, too.

This is all I can manage today. I know I've been away from the blog lately, but don't give up on me. I'll get back to it. My heart grows a little heavier with each passing day, and I don't have words to express how I'm feeling now that 11.11.11 is right around the corner. I don't have words, but I do have family, friends, and prayers. I'm hangin' on tight.

October 15, 2011

Remembering Our Babies

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

Today, let us honor the lives who graced this earth for a short time, yet whose impact on this earth is immeasurable.

Today, let us remember the babies who were born too soon, who will never take their first steps, who will never sleep in their cribs, empty, waiting. Let us give a voice to the babies who were born silent, sleeping. Let us remember the mommies, daddies, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, who are deeply affected by the lives that ended much too soon.

Today, I honor my children.

We have named our babies. Although it may seem hard to imagine, I feel closer to them in many ways as the days pass. I breathe their spirit. They are always with me. They grace my dreams and sit on my heart every moment of every day. They are real. Today is about acknowledging their impact, cherishing their legacy and honoring their everlasting life.

We believe we have chosen the most perfect names for our babies. Daddy had the amazing idea to name them after angels. We searched and searched, and found names we liked, before we knew the meaning behind the names. Once we found the meanings, we knew it was meant to be.

Elijah 'Eli' Thomas

Elijah-Angel of Innocence. Believed to have created the tree of life. Guardian of all newborn children and those who die at an early age.

Michael David

Michael- Angel of Miracles. Strengthens the spirit during difficult times or dangerous situations. He inspires truth, patience and love in the human heart. He is also thought to be the one who gently leads our souls to heaven.

Perfection. Just like them. We chose Thomas as Elijah's middle name after his daddy. We chose David as Michael's middle name after his papi (my daddy) and his uncle (TJ's brother).

Elijah and Michael,

Mommy and Daddy miss you more than words can possibly express. We thank God that we were chosen to be your parents. We know you are watching down on us everyday, guiding us and teaching us. Please don't be sad when you see us cry. We are trying to figure out how to get along on earth without you, but we are already celebrating the day we'll see you in Heaven. When I get there, I will hold you both so tight in my arms and will never let you go. Until then, please hold tight to eachother, play, run around, explore and laugh. Please keep watch over mommy and daddy and please visit us often in our dreams. I pray to God that He gives you a love that I cannot even imagine giving you, and I have never felt a love so deep as the one I feel for you. Thank you for continuing to bless our lives everyday. We miss you. We love you. We cherish you.

With our whole hearts,
Mommy and Daddy

For Michael, Elijah, Max, Alex, Cord and for all of the other babies whose mommies and daddies are aching today and everyday in their absence. We walk this earth for you.

October 3, 2011

Must Have Monday

Hi Friends,

How was your weekend? Ours was nice.

Quick Recap:

*Friday night was sushi date night, yum.

*Went for a family run on Saturday. So the hubby and I have started running again {or trying our hardest to!} so we wanted to get in a good run on Saturday, But, I always feel guilty for Sadie Bug because she's by herself during the week when we are at work. TJ says I am projecting and that she just sleeps all day, but still, I feel bad! So, naturally, I want to include her in any and all weekend activities. I planned on walking with Bug while hubby ran the greenway. Well, she wasn't having it. As soon as he took off, so did she. Yep, the little westie ran me through the entire trail! She's really not a "runner girl" like some dogs, but this one was taking off like a greyhound after her daddy. Pretty classic. And, I ended up getting my run in, afterall. :)

*My family came for a quick visit. We had lunch with my parents, sister and brother-in-law, and precious niece, then spent the day toodling around. I love when they come to visit!

*Hubby and I went to dinner and made it an early/redbox kind of night.

*We went to church on Sunday then I attempted hot yoga while he went mountain bike riding. I have recently started taking yoga classes and think they are great. I have taken hot yoga before, but it has been a while. Let's just say the yogi girls in front of me doing HEAD stands set my eago back a few notches. Hmm..

*Then I came home and spent the rest of the day in the kitchen. Minestrone soup for dinner and pumpkin muffins were in the oven. 'Twas a nice little Sunday. :)

My must-haves this Monday are finding things to look forward to at the start of a long week. I'm having some girlfriends over on Thursday and I could not be more excited. Now my only problem is narrowing down my list of goodies to prepare!

I am also going to try and start some projects. I subscribe to Martha Stewart Living, Better Homes and Gardens, Southern Living and Real Simple. I know, I have a problem. But, I'm loving all of the seasonal inspiration right now. I think I want to try these:

Oh, and since I really like to celebrate the goodness in life, I thought I would share a couple lost photos from our big anniversary {number two} from last Monday.


What do you do to make your Mondays marvelous? I'd love to know. :)

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